Wednesday, December 21, 2005

the weather outside is frightful, but blogging is so gd delightful

eb and sf had me over for dinner tonight and eb kindly offered to drive me home, since channel 7 news said that it is 9 degrees out. when we went outside i commented that it felt warmer than 9. i started laughing, "it's a warm 9." "yes, balmy," she agreed. "in fact," i said, "it feels 12."

ab and i went outside to smoke at work this afternoon and she told me that craig's list has a best-of category, which will now be my new favorite website. i typically don't find that i have as much time as everyone else seems to have for reading through cl every day, but i always greatly appreciate the crazyass forwards that people send. my only cl experience was when i was about to leave dc and i had an old pc to get rid of. i couldn't find a reasonable way to recycle it and no non-profits i approached were interested (it was like windows 95, old yellowing plastic, huge monitor), so i threw up a post that if anyone wanted to take it, all they had to do was show up to my apartment at 6:00 pm the next day and haul it away. i got five responses immediately. the guy that ended up taking it was s.a.d. slight frame, greasy long hair, and the filthiest car i have ever seen (outside of ag and my friend kk, who, ironically, had a vaccum cleaner in the backseat of her car for over a year, piled amongst old bottles, papers, and rotting egg mcmuffins). this guy must have been collecting marlboro miles because he had at least 347 empty cigarette packs sitting on top of utter garbage. we had to throw the computer into his equally jam-packed-with-crap trunk, and i bet the computer is still sitting there. anyway, check out the best-of-craig's-list webpage. thanks to ab for that and for giving me a piece of hotdog gum. sadly, while shaped like a hotdog, it was cinnamon flavored.

ag's FY05 boyfriend roger ebert has posted his best movies of 2005 list. sadly, i have only seen 2 of his top 10, and only a handful of the rest of the other notables. GOD. i suck. click here to read. i hope he comes out with a worst-of-the-year list, because that man is a master of the diss. click here for his current (as of august 2005) shittiest-movies-of-all-time list.

vice magazine's website has a hilarious post about how to stalk a guy that you just hooked up with. and not "google him and maybe walk by his office building at lunch" but "i-would-boil-his-daughter's-pet-rabbit-if-it-was-an-option" stalking. now THIS is investigative journalism at its finest. thanks for the link, jk.

the folks at jib jab animated an end-of-the-year bush singalong. click here. db and i were flipping channels last night and came across some gwb impersonator saying, "i'm a uniter, not a divider. really. i don't know how to divide." maybe you had to be there, but it was magical.

so pat robertson is suing my guvner - he is soooooo fucking funny! the chicagoist has the details. i don't understand why you would become a pharmacist if you were so dead-set against science, or failed to understand the difference between "i could end up pregnant" and "i am now pregnant." even i know the difference, and i have the working knowledge of what is probably equivalent to a 7th-grade science education. they need to come up with a better name for the "morning after pill" - it sounds like you do the walk of shame to your medicine cabinet to swallow it down with whatever's left in the vodka bottle, hoping that by the time you're done, the random guy you brought home has located the front door and has stealthily snuck out so you don't have an awkward "uh, see you around" moment.

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