Wednesday, November 29, 2006

this post demonstrates how entirely unambitious i am on an average wednesday.

i can get bored. very, very, life-force-suckingly bored. you can only check dlisted so many times a day, you know, for even the most vapid news and photos. i started going through the onion's av club archives earlier (inspired by the homeless guy who tried to sell me a copy of the onion for a dollar today - sorry, dude, i understand how streetwise is a logical item to buy from you, but i can go to the onion's green plastic box and pick up my own copy for free). they have a great "ask the av club" section where people write in with random "what was that show i loved as a kid?" questions, like that 80s tv show with the girl who could stop time because her dad is an alien who she communicates with via a glass candy dish (that would be out of this world, and burt reynolds voiced her dad).
i got super excited when someone asked about a made-for-tv movie from the 80s about a girl whose siblings tie her shoelaces together as a prank, and when they get into a car accident she is trapped inside the car, which explodes. i have thought about that movie, no shit, on an at least bi-monthly basis for the past twenty-plus years, remembering not its name, stars or context, but remembering a scene where a little girl severs a house's electric wiring with a pizza cutter. it was quite terrifying (to me when i was seven). i have looked for it on imdb to no avail, probably because i always thought that the little girl from poltergeist who died mysteriously when she was 12 was its star.

but now i know: it's called don't go to sleep, it starred valerie harper and ruth gordon, and it's probably not scary at all but my desire to see it again has increased like 643 times. not available on netflix. since christmas is coming up, i'll add this to the list of things-i-want-that-i-wont-get.

now if only i could figure out - and find on dvd - the name of the made-for-network-tv mini-series i saw in the second grade about world war ii, hitler, the secret service, and concentration camps. one scene that is forever seared into my brain is when a man in a suit tries to walk past some secret service agents at some sort of check-point, and they rip his sleeve to reveal his number tattoo and they knock him down in a spray of bullets as he starts running from them. this was quality entertainment for a seven-year-old. i distinctly remember not wanting to take the garbage out because i was scared that there were nazis in the garage.

also: anyone remember amazing stories? i remember it as being an awesome series, but part of me tends to lean toward believeing that, now that i am an adult, it's total crap.


formidableflower said...

perhaps it was Amerika, the 1987 miniseries about what might have happened if the soviet union won the cold war and took over the U.S. or wait. maybe that was just the freakish miniseries forever seared into my brain from childhood.

Miss Misc said...

I loved out of this world! "would you like to swing on a star, carry moon beams home in a jar..."

What about "small wonder?"

Or that movie with the kid who was kidnapped by a pedophile, then returned home like 10 years later. But then he was killed in an accident in his 20s. And his brother turned out to the Yellowstone killer or something. That's your trivia of the day, what's that movie called?!

scissors happy said...

it's called I KNOW MY FIRST NAME IS STEVEN - and i didn't even have to IMDB it. yay!!!

Miss Misc said...

Hmph, very good my dear. Well what about the one where the kid was all burnt up...umm, I don't remember the actual plot but he looked a hot ass mess (no pun intended)

scissors happy said...

oh yeah - his dad took him to disneyworld for a vacation and then to get back at his ex-wife tried to burn the hotel room down and kill the kid, but the kid survived and was totally burned up and had to live a painful and horrible life? forget the name, but that shit is brutal.

Miss Misc said...

Wow, you're good, really good.