Friday, May 11, 2007

longest week ever, please come to an end.

i saw the nerdiest thing ever this morning: a segway leaning against the r2d2 post office box at the corner of michigan and ontario.

which reminds me of the nerdiest joke i've heard in a while, relayed to me by pos, but he got it from te (i hope te did not make this up) – last friday he said “happy star wars day” and i was like “what?” and he said “may the 4th.” god, that’s bad. speaking of nerds, george lucas kinda mocked the spiderman series, and best week ever takes him to task for it. i haven't seen any of the spiderman movies and no i don't feel left out. one more star wars nerd item: i went to the post office a few weeks ago and i asked for two books of the new star wars stamps, and the middle-aged clerk just looked at me over the frames of her bifocals and said, kinda disapprovingly, "those aren't available for a while." and then i was just like "ummm, one book of anything, then, please. flags. i don't care." i got called out by a postal clerk. bitch.

anyway . . .

your ipod can kill you. err, well, kill your grandparents. all i know is that i firmly believe that i emit a small electrical charge that kills my ipods. there is no other logical explanation for why i went through seven ipods in two and a half years - five 40 gigs and two 60 gigs. every three months, like clockwork, they died. i have had my nano for about three months now and no complaints. i'm sure that now that i have mentioned it, my nano will decide that it doesn't really like what it does for a living and move on. rm told me about this service, where you can trade in your busted ipod for cash. all i got was a shitty 10 percent off of my next purchase (afore-mentioned nano) and an unshakeable sense of dread.

mj wrote a fantastic post about "collectors" and i started clicking around and came upon this website of corpsey-looking dolls, which is truly fucking creepy. click here for the baby i am terrified that i will end up with.

i could seriously watch eight hours of law & order and feel bad that i had to turn off the tv and go to bed. and i love david cross. and i love when snarky people edit movies, shows and videos down into a short, to-the-point video. behold: the best l&o episode ("ripped from the headlines!!!") that i can't wait to catch in re-runs on a&e (OR on nbc, OR on tnt – god i love that it is ALWAYS on). kristy swanson actually kinda does look like a bloated stoned anna nicole. except her babydaddy is a then-married figure skater, as opposed to a gay-seeming paparazzo (and/or insane morphine-providing lawyer leech, and/or zsa zsa's nutzedout elderly fake prince husband).

play this the next time you're bored at work: both relaxing and infuriating. just like my Absolute Number One Yes Awesome Love It Distraction, tetris.

pos and i are taking our mummys to the sunday tea at the drake hotel for mother's day. they get to meet for the first time and i hope they end up talking about which of their respective kids is secretly their favorite and braid eachother's hair and shit like that. neither of them are like these mothers, so everything ought to work out just great.

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