Monday, January 11, 2010

animals! i like them!

i start interviewing for an open position in my division this week. i have over 60 resumes for a job that only requires 3 year's project management experience and the pay is in the 40s, and almost everyone is so over-qualified it makes me wanna cry for them. there are applicants who are certified in things i don't even know what they're talking about, a guy who used to do i.t. for wal-mart's headquarters ($84 an hour), people older than my dad . . . oh, yeah, and pos' ex-girlfriend (um, seriously? are you being a stalker or are you for real?). interviewing people is really nerve-wracking - like, are you really as good as you seem? are you secretly an asshole and i will only discover this slowly but surely, when it's way too late? are you going to end up being a sociopath? if this dude came in for an interview, i would hire him. if only it were that simple.

i still think that working for me would be better than this job. well, maybe.

ready, set, calm yourself with this adorable collection of photos of a fawn and a bunny.

all animals, all the time (sorry, really) tonight: these photos of animals in utero are gorgeous creepy.

i swear that i'm not sitting at home in a sweatsuit and laughing at cathy comics and gluing magazine cutouts of baby animals into my special happy-thoughts notebook.

i really really love florence + the machine right now. lungs is an awesome album. just downloaded a not-shitty cover of "addicted to love." i put "falling" on my 2010 new years mix that no one except for friends i see on a regular basis has yet received because the fucking automatic machine at the post office is a LIAR and apparently, even though it only charged me $1.05 per padded envelope i was sending out, it was supposed to have charged me $1.59, and i have a stack of returned envelopes sitting in a bag in my kitchen that i am angry at. so, if you're waiting for yours, you'll get it - when i am not too pissy to address the situation.

okay, one more animal link - this lab rat (about 1:40 in, but watch the whole thing) chose cocaine over food and water and self-injected itself until it died. if only it had been able to join others in a fellowship that featured the jesus factor.

sometimes old tried-and-true tricks don't work (click to make larger and be sure to read the professor's note). bonus points for this kid.

a new nomination for the worst album cover of all time here.

sensitive supermarket advertising ploy here.

so, like, where do i sign up? i just hope that he looks like this. speaking of dudes who look like that, pos and i went out to dinner and to see avatar in 3d on friday (it was, of course, spectacular and retarded at the same time) and our waiter was this really over-talkative and sweaty d&d kid who was like "and how are you on this fine second weekend of the new year? can i get you a drink, madam? sir? ahhh, yes, excellent choices, excellent. i'm going to go get those for you and then swing back around to tell you about our scrumptious specials." he seriously said, when he came back, "just so you know, i'm not merely your waiter tonight but a wizard who will conjure up whatever it is that you choose from the menu." pos and i stared at each other in a silent competition to see who would lose composure first.

this probably isn't real. but oh do i hope it is. click to enlarge.

accidentally inappropriate: my favorite. here are some games and puzzles that should have been double-checked.

i am currently wading though the C bands in my itunes for possible deletion and overall need to vary what it is that i listen to. this morning, on the train, i was listening to my three coolio songs and i was thinking 1) remember when this was considered good? 2) maybe this was never good and 3) i hope no one can hear this coming out of my earphones. if it had been mc trebek, maybe i would have shaken my ass a little.

i'm really looking forward to having kids.

another excellent "people asking the stupidest questions fathomable on yahoo answers" link.

okay, fuck it, i lied - two more animal links - a news item and a really great photography collection posted by the guy who made the amazing american psycho homage/talking heads cover video (it's a must-see).

husband home soon. must meet him at the door with a bourbon, his slippers and folded newspaper.

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